House of Figs

The name Bethany means 'house of figs'.  I always knew this growing up but it never meant anything to me.  I didn't even know what a fig was!  This changed when I had the opportunity to go on a hiking trip through Israel and Jordan during the summer of 2015.

One of the first places we went to was Bethany beyond the Jordan.  Our fearless leader Wyn explained that Bethany meant 'house of affliction' as well as 'house of figs'.  In the way he explained it this gave me a whole new meaning to my name.  

Despite suffering and affliction, I am to be bearing fruit and going through a process of refining.  The fig tree bears fruit all year long and if not, it is cut down.  This blew my mind.  At the time, the Lord had been teaching me about refining and being molded through difficulties.  

I also learned that my name means 'house of song'.  Anyone who knows me (or has lived with me) knows that I am constantly singing.  I don't mean to drive people crazy but I just LOVE singing! Yet even during trials, I want to be bearing fruit and singing praises to Jesus no matter what!  I have my name to remind me of that.

Despite suffering and affliction, I am to be bearing fruit and going through a process of refining.  

I had no idea that 4 months later, my world would be turned upside down and this would be tested again.  On October 15, 2015, my sister Adriana, took her own life while studying abroad in Germany.

Right now, I'm in the trenches.  My soul is being wrung out.  And my pain and mess are oozing out of me in unpleasant and in very ugly ways.  Yet, this is the process of refining brought by much pain. Could it be that God, in his sovereignty, wanted to teach me these truths in Israel in preparation for the nightmare that only HE knew would happen?  God works in mysterious ways.

So, I'm starting this blog to help me process my journey and invite people into my mess.  I'm sitting under the fig tree trusting God in moments of trial in order that I may bear much fruit and sing the song that I was meant to sing.  Through this, may God be glorified.

"Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me."

John 15